When I became a new Christian at age 30, I was dating men in the hopes of getting married. After I became a Christian, it took me a while before I realized I should only be considering dedicated brothers in Christ for any future marriage plans!
Yet I was still approached by non-Christians and nominal-only Christians, and I had to come up with something to tell them. Or maybe to remind myself? Here are some of my answers to the question, why only consider a Christian man for marriage?
God says so. Genesis 28:1, Judges 4:15, 1 Kings 11:3-5, Song of Solomon 4:10, Ezekiel 16:31-33, 1 Corinthians 7:39, 2 Corinthians 6:14, 1 Peter 3:7
A man is the head of his wife (Ephesians 5:23). If he does not lead her to God (1 Corinthians 9:5) or wash her in the Word (Ephesians 5:25-27), then where is he leading her? If he refuses to lead her, then why would she marry him? (1 Timothy 3:12)
A Christian man knows God wants him to marry and have children (Genesis 9:1, Psalm 127:4, 1 Timothy 5:14). How could a non-Christian man know this and why it is so?
A man who knows Christ, knows his role is to be humble to Christ and submitted to Him, and to lead, protect, cherish and provide for his wife and children (Micah 6:8). How could a non-Christian man do this?
How could I share spiritual matters and discuss the Word of God with an unsaved man? How could I love and be intimate with a man I knew would spend eternity in hell (if God did not intervene before the end of his life)?
A Christian man understands that love, truth, and beauty actually exist (Philipians 4:8), but a non-Christian man isn't quite sure. What if it's just electro-chemicals in the brain caused by random chance accident, he can't help but wonder sometimes (PBS "love").
A Christian man has faith to continue on and overcome problems and remain faithful, but a non-Christian man's faith is only in himself, and when he runs into problems cannot remain true...a woman becomes an unbearable burden, then; he does not have the strength of Christ to sustain him (2 Corinthians 12:9, Philipians 4:13, 1 Peter 5:10).
A Christian man will agree with God that he is a sinner (Rom. 3:22-24, 1 Jn. 1:8), that he sins in specific ways, and repent of those sins, and be sanctified by the Word and Spirit (Lev. 5:4-6, Ezek. 18:29-31, Luke 13:3, Luke 17:4, Acts 3:19, Jn. 17:17-20, 1 Cor. 6:11)so that he will become more holy, as God is holy (1 Pet. 1:16), and be ever more conformed to the image of Christ (Rom. 8:28-30). Also, he can forgive the sins of his wife, as Christ has forgiven his sin and hers (Matt. 6:15, Mark 11:25, Eph. 4:32).
A non-Christian could influence me away from God, and perhaps any children we might have also (see above Scripture, next to "God says so").
That's just for starters ;)
But it's probably enough...
Please comment--how do you (or would you) handle this, especially if you are a woman living on her own with no fatherly protection?
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